Digital dating apps are radically changing the way we approach potential partners. Who needs a wingman when you've got a phone?
In the seminal 1998 rom-com, You’ve Got Mail, the Meg Ryan character is too ashamed to look co-lead Tom Hanks in the eyes as she confesses that she’s developed feelings for a man she’s been anonymously emailing. Of course, Meg has yet to find out that that man is Tom Hanks – but that’s just the kind of romantic hi-jinks people got themselves into in pre-9/11, sepia-toned New York.
Fifteen years on, the landscape has changed dramatically. A week struggles to go by without a new weapon being added to the digital arsenal of the lonely singleton, from the Tinder revolution – two million Americans “matched” on the app every day – to an ever-growing collection of niche services that specialise in helping just about anyone to meet anyone. There’s hope for us all.
But what does digital dating offer that its offline counterpart can’t? According to Dr Paul Eastwick of the Attraction and Relationships Research Lab at the University of Texas the key advantage is how much it boosts the number of people you have access to. “People use online dating services to gain access to potential partners that they never would have had a chance to meet otherwise.”
Compared to its offline counterpart, digital dating also requires significantly less effort. You can now flirt outrageously from the sofa, in pyjamas, as you wolf down last night’s pizza. “It’s deemed convenient. Something to be done from the comfort of home,” says Paula Migliardi, research co-ordinator at the Sexuality Education Resource Centre in Manitoba. However, this convenience, combined with the increased number of people in the “pool”, means the rate at which people must approve or dismiss potential partners also rockets.